In the 10 years that my daughter was married for, I was paying dowry twice. My uncle said his conscience would never allow him to do that. But my father just smiled and went away. My father never cared about his image as long as he got his job done. So I took the same mentality. In one sense it was easy to allow jerks their way till they changed their minds. And they always did. My other uncle however, who expected full respect from everyone, brooked no disrespect. When my cousin sister had a similar problem with her in-laws and the atmosphere became heated, my uncle decided that respect was more important than saving the marriage. So it has come to the state of divorce for my cousin-sister. I paid dowry financially the first time and next when I put him into a job that wasn't there in my company.